|| Shri Hari ||

Duties in a Household Life

 continued

Question -  How can a householder be free of worries,  because he has to provide for, marry his children and take on various other domestic responsibilities and liabilities ?  

Answer -  Every being is born according to his fate.  The fate involves three factors - birth, age and pleasures or pain as the fruit of the past actions.   Out of these three a being has already taken birth.  As far as age is concerned,  he will live as long as is destined and he will face pleasure and pain in the form of desirable and undesirable circumstances.  In fact circumstances don’t make a man happy or sad but he becomes happy or sad in the favorable or unfavorable circumstances out of ignorance.*  

If a girl is marriageable age, her parents should not be worried because everything has been decided by her own fate.  So she will have favorable or unfavorable circumstances according to her fate.  But parents should think that she should be married to a deserving young man of a goog family so that she may lead a happy life.  But it is beyond their power to make her happy or to send her to a good family.  Therefore parents should perform their duty without being worried.  Worry makes the innersense (heart) impure and there is no progress.  They should perform their duty after giving a serious thought to it because the thought develops intellect.  So every person should give a serious thought to how to perform an activity but he should not worry about it.  If a problem is thought over, being free from worry,  a suitable solution is certainly found out.

* Sati mule tadvipaako jaatyaayurbhogaah  (Yogadarshan 2/13)   

(to be continued....... ) 

 ‒From the book ‘Jeevan ka Kartavya' by Swami Ramsukhdasji

|| Shri Hari ||

Duties in a Household Life

 continued

Question -  If we have no son,  who will offer us oblation and water;  and how shall we meet with a good fate without the offering of water and oblation ?   

Answer - continued..... 

He who desires to receive the offering of water and oblation,  wants to follow the cycle of birth and death, because he is born somewhere,  then and then only he will have  a desire to receive the offering of oblation and water.  If he is not born, why should he expect the offering of oblation and water ?   

It is totally wrong that a man does not attain salvation without a son.  If the offspring led a man to salvation, the eleven young ones of a pig and a hundred and eight young ones of a snake would lead the pig and the snake to salvation.   Similarly the larger number of children should lead their parents to salvation.  But it does not happen so.  

A man should be engaged in god’s adoration by depending on Him whether he has offspring or not.  If a person can’t renounce the desire of having offspring,  he (she) should regard Rama or Krishna as his son and should love him as his own son.   He (Lord Rama or Krishna) will serve him so sincerely that a real son can’t serve him. He will make his father’s life successful,  here as well as, here after.  

  

(to be continued....... ) 

 ‒From the book ‘Jeevan ka Kartavya' by Swami Ramsukhdasji

|| Shri Hari ||

Duties in a Household Life

 continued

Question -  If a couple have no son,  who will serve them in  their old age ?  

Answer -  Do all sons serve their parents ?   How will the sons, who want to lay claim to their parents’ property and regard the offering of obsequial oblation as a futile activity,  serve the parents ?   They prove to be troublesome to their parents.  A man receives service and comforts according to his fate whether he has sons or no.  We have clearly notices that people serve the dispassionate saints more than sons serve their parents.  It means that sons don’t necessarily serve parents.  

Question -  If we have no son,  who will offer us oblation and water;  and how shall we meet with a good fate without the offering of water and oblation ?   

Answer -  Those who receive the offering of water and oblation have to follow the cycle of birth and death.  As a traveller breaks his journey on account of hunger and thirst and again starts his journey having eaten food and drunk water;  so do the departed souls stop at a place without the offering of oblation and water.  But when oblation and water are offered to them,  they start from that place and their cycle of birth and death begins but they don’t attain salvation.  

In fact,  salvation does not in the least depend on offspring.  If salvation depends on offspring,  it means that salvation is dependent.  Then how is the human life independent ?  When even attachment to the body is an impediment to salvation,  how will the hope of receiving oblation and water from sons after death lead a man to salvation ?   It will lead him only to bondage.  Therefore the person who wants to attain salvation,  should renounce the three desires -  of sons,  of honour and of wealth,  because all these three are the stumbling blocks to God Realization.

  

(to be continued....... ) 

 ‒From the book ‘Jeevan ka Kartavya' by Swami Ramsukhdasji

|| Shri Hari ||

Duties in a Household Life

 continued

Question -  How are we indebted to creatures (Bhootarna) and how to rid ourselves of this debt ?  

Answer -  All creatures such as cows-buffaloes,  sheep-goats, camels-horses etc.,  nourish and sustain our life.  Trees, plants and creepers provide us fruits, flowers,  leaves and wood etc.,  So we are indebted to them.  We are free from this debt by feeding animals and birds and by providing water to them and by manuring and watering trees and creepers etc.   

Question -  How are we indebted to human beings and how to rid ourselves of this debt ?   

Answer -  We don’t sustain our life without the help of other human beings.  We walk along the paths (roads) made by others.  We use the water of the wells constructed by others.    We make use of the trees planted by others and we eat the food produced by others.  Therefore,  we can rid ourselves of this debt by providing wells, water-huts, trees,  roads, hospices and food.  

A householder has to pay all these five kinds of debts.  He who totally surrenders himself to God,  does not remain indebted to manes and gods etc.,  he rids himself of all debts.  

Question -  Should a couple who have no children, adopt a kith or kin or an orphan boy or girl ?  

Answer -  In the world of today,  it is advisable for a couple not to adopt any children.  The reason is that when even one’s own son does not serve and obey his parents, how will the adopted son serve and obey them ?   Though there is an ordinance of the scriptures for a couple to adopt a child so that he may offer water and oblation to them;  yet what is the use of adopting when he will not offer water and oblation to the manes ?  If we needed a son,  God would give us one.  We need no son, so God has not given us one.  Why should we get into trouble by adopting a child ?   Generally it is noticed that adopted sons trouble parents and don’t serve them.  Therefore,  such couples should educate and serve orphan boys and should make arrangement for their maintenance.   

  

(to be continued....... ) 

 ‒From the book ‘Jeevan ka Kartavya' by Swami Ramsukhdasji

|| Shri Hari ||

Duties in a Household Life

 continued

Question -  Can a person be free from the debt of manes without giving birth to offspring ?   

Answer -  Yes he can be free.  He who totally surrenders himself to God,  becomes free from all debts -   

Devarsibhootaaptanrnaam pitreenaam

Na kinkaro naayamrni cha raajan

Sarvaatmanaa yah saranam saranyam

Gato mukundam parihrtya kartam

(Srimad Bhagwat 11/5/41)  

‘O’ King,  he who surrenders himself to God,  does not remain indebted and a servant (slave) to anyone - gods, sages, creatures, family and manes.’   

Question - How are we indebted to gods and how to rid ourselves of this debts ?   

Answer -  We receive rain, air, sunshine, sunlight and moonlight by which we maintain our body, and the earth holds all of us - thus we are indebted to gods.   The offerings of oblation to the fire god and performance of religious sacrifice nourish gods and we become free from our debts.   

Question -  How are we indebted to sages and how to rid ourselves of this debt ?  

Answer -  We are indebted to sages and saints for the books and ‘Smritis’  (19 books of traditional Hindu law)  composed by them.  Those books impart teaching and preaching to us and make us realize what ought to be done and what ought not to be done.  We become free from this debt by studying and teaching these books,  by morning-evening prayers and by reciting Gayatri Mantra (a Vedic metre which is to be recited daily by the twice born).   

(to be continued....... ) 

 ‒From the book ‘Jeevan ka Kartavya' by Swami Ramsukhdasji

|| Shri Hari ||

Duties in a Household Life

 continued

Question -  Do manes receive the oblation offered to them ?  

Answer -  continued...

Today the necessities of life such as food and clothes etc.,   that we honorably receive may be either the fruit of our virtuous actions of the past or of the oblation offered by our sons and grand sons etc.,  of the previous life.  But it is certainly decided by the fate.  

As a person deposits an amount of a hundred thousand rupees in a bank in three accounts -  his own, his wife’s and his son’s,  he can withdraw the money only from his own account.  As far as the money deposited in the accounts of his wife and son is concerned, only they can withdraw it.  Similarly, the oblation offered to manes is received by them only.  But if we offer oblation in the form of cooked rice ball and water in our name,  we shall receive it after death.   In Gaya,  the cooked rice balls and water offered in the name of beasts, and birds is received by them.  A person loves his cow very much.  When the cow died,  he had a dream and he saw thtat the cow was in a very miserable and sad condition.  He went to Gaya and offered oblation of cooked rice ball and water for her.  She again appeared to him when he had a dream and she was very happy.  

We have not so much of claim to the money earned by our father,  grand-father and great-grand-father as we have on our own earned money.  According to the family tradition,  our sons and grand-sons have a claim to the money of our father and grand-father etc.  Similarly the manes receive the water and oblation offered to them by sons and grand-sons according to the family tradition.   So it is the responsibility of sons and grand-sons to offer oblation and water to father and grand-father etc.   

It is not a rule that after death, all people must go to the world of manes,  because they meet with destiny according to their actions.   

Question -  What happens to the water and oblation offered by the son whose parents have attained salvation and gone to the Abode of God ?   

Answer -  If the son’s parents have attained salvation and gone to the Abode of God,  but the son does not know it,  the oblation and water offered and the charity given in their name,  is deposited in the account of the son and he receive it after death, in the same way as the money sent by the sender,  comes back to him if the addressee is not available.   

(to be continued....... ) 

 ‒From the book ‘Jeevan ka Kartavya' by Swami Ramsukhdasji